Controlling and Directing with Questions

This scenario plays out every day in millions of households every day.

Wife: (from the kitchen to husband in living room) What do you want for dinner?

Husband: Let's go out.

Wife: You don't like my cooking?

Husband: (from the doghouse) That's not what I meant. (Too late!)


Wife: (from the kitchen to husband in living room) What do you want for dinner?

Husband: I can cook on the barbecue.

(See it coming?)

Wife: You don't like my cooking?

Husband: (from the doghouse) That's not what I meant. (Too late!)


Wife: (from the kitchen to husband in living room) What do you want for dinner?

Husband: (thinking, 'maybe I should ask a question') What do you feel like?

Wife: What did you say?

Husband: (louder) I asked what you wanted.

Wife: Lemon Pepper Chicken or Hot Dogs and Beans?

Husband: (louder) Hot Dogs and Beans!

Wife: What's wrong with my Lemon Pepper Chicken?

Husband: (from the doghouse) That's not what I meant. (Too late!)


Last one....

Wife: (from the kitchen to husband in living room) What do you want for dinner?

Husband: (doesn't answer)

Wife: comes into the living room and asks, "Did you hear me?"

Husband: Sorry. Hear what?

Wife: I asked you what you wanted for dinner.

Husband: Hhmmm! What are you thinking. Any choices?

Wife: I was thinking Lemon Pepper Chicken or Hot Dogs and Beans.

(notice who's asking and who's answering.)

Husband: Tough choices. Are you leaning in a direction?

Wife: I'm thinking Lemon Pepper Chicken.

Husband: Isn't that a lot of work for you? Wouldn't hot dogs and beans be easier?

Wife. You're right. Hot dogs and beans would be easier.

Husband: Can I help?

Wife: No. I've got it


Notice that by 'not hearing' his wife's call from the kitchen, the last husband got to have a face to face, lower voice, tonality controlled conversation.

Remembering to ask questions and knowing what questions to ask is a lot of what we talk about.

May I ask you a question?

The last time you earned $100,000, how long did it take? A year? Two years? Six months? What do you need to change to have a $100,000 quarter or a $100,000 month? Want to explore?

 


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