Science, Engineering & Sales

Six sales lessons from the world of science and engineering.

Two engineering students were biking across a university campus when
one said, "Where did you get such a great bike?"

The second engineer replied, "Well, I was walking along yesterday,
minding my own business, when a beautiful woman rode up on this bike,
threw it to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, "Take what
you want."

The first engineer nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice: The
clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway.

Sometimes, we miss the obvious, but sometimes what's obvious isn't the solution to the problem that we care about.


To the optimist, the glass is half-full. To the pessimist, the glass is 
half-empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs
to be.

Be sure to understand what the buyer thinks is the problem before you present your solution.


A priest, a doctor, and an engineer were waiting one morning for a
particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, "What's 
with those guys? We must have been waiting for fifteen minutes!"

The doctor chimed in, "I don't know, but I've never seen 
such inept golf!"

The priest said, "Here comes the greens-keeper. Let's have a word with 

him." He said, "Hello George, What's wrong with that group ahead of
us? They're rather slow, aren't they?"

The greens-keeper replied, "Oh, yes. That's a group of blind firemen.
They lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire last year, so
we always let them play for free anytime!."

The group fell silent for a moment. The priest said, "That's so sad. I
think I will say a special prayer for them tonight."

The doctor said, "Good idea. I'm going to contact my ophthalmologist
colleague and see if there's anything she can do for them."

The engineer said, "Why can't they play at night?"

Explore all solutions?


Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it. Engineers
believe that if it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet.

Keep it Simple, Stupid!


An engineer was crossing a road one day, when a frog called out to him
and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent 
over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up 
again and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn back into a beautiful princess and

stay with you for one week."

The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and
returned it to the pocket.

The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a
princess, I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want."

Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back
into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a
beautiful princess and that I'll stay with you for one week and do
anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"

The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time 
for a girlfriend, but a talking frog - now that's cool."

Understand your prospect. If they are excitedly happy about the status quo, no presentation will work.


Two engineers were standing at the base of a flagpole, looking at its
top. A woman walked by and asked what they were doing.

"We're supposed to find the height of this flagpole," said one, "but
we don't have a ladder."

The woman took a wrench from her purse, loosened a couple 
of bolts, and laid the pole down on the ground. Then she took a tape 
measure from her pocketbook, took a measurement, and announced, 

"Twenty one feet, six inches," and walked away.

One engineer shook his head and laughed, "A lot of good that does us.
We ask for the height and she gives us the length!"

Both engineers have since quit their engineering jobs and are
currently serving in the United States Congress.

When women speak, listen.


I hope that you enjoyed these. The regular text came from my neighbor. The bold from me.

How was 1Q17? What's your goal for 2Q?

  • Make up for 1Q?
  • Best Q ever?
  • Sell enough to take the summer off? (This was always mine.)

Do you think in quarters? Have you broken your BHAG up into rocks? Have you read this article?

Are you the CEO of your company, the virtual CEO of your sales group or the CEO of You, Yourself, Inc?

Maybe it's time.


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